Blog November 30, 2020

Long-Distance Relationship After Moving

If you are planning a relocation soon that will result in a long-distance relationship between you and your partner, you should make sure you go into this process prepared.

Moving in itself is a stressful event, especially when you take into consideration that you are going away from friends or that you need to get a job before you move. But if you add a partner who, for whatever reason, cannot follow you on your journey to that equation, things can get just a little too hectic. Whatever the reasons are, it is crucial that you both feel prepared for this step. To help you do that, we have put together some handy tips.

Ask Difficult Questions – About Love, Break Up, and Getting Married

Sure, there are some important questions to ask movers. But in this situation, there are some even more important questions you should ask yourself and your partner. As your relocation date is nearing, sit down with your significant other for a serious and honest talk. Try to address all the issues that you can see possibly arising in the future. Is this relocation a temporary or a permanent solution? What will that mean for your plans and goals for the future? How will it affect your plans to get married or start a family? What are the events that would prompt you to think about breaking up? Is your love strong enough for this?

Even though it is hard, it is crucial that you address these issues honestly and open-mindedly. That is the only way to make sure you both know what you’re getting yourselves into and how this new situation will affect your partnership. Acknowledge that it will require a lot of hard work. Of course, if you have children or pets together, or if you share your finances, you should discuss these topics as well. In short, every aspect of your lives that will be affected by the upcoming relocation should be chewed on during this conversation.

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Make the Best of Your New Long-Distance Relationship Situation After Moving

Whatever the reasons for your move are, one thing is for sure – moping around about it is a waste of time. Now that you are in a long-distance relationship, try to focus on making it work instead of missing the physical presence of your significant other. Consider these tips once your relocation is over.

Communication in Moderation

Communicating with each other openly and keeping in touch as much as you can is, of course, crucial for maintaining a healthy partnership. However, you can have too much of a good thing. Even though it will be tempting at first, calling your significant other every chance you get, texting them non-stop to remind them that you miss them, and checking up on them every couple of minutes is bound to get overbearing pretty quickly. Think about it – even when you had lived together (or close to each other), you didn’t spend every waking moment talking to each other. This shouldn’t change now that one of you lives in a different state. Scheduling a time for talking to each other could work as a great solution to this problem.

Video Calls and Other Technology

One of the main drawbacks of long-distance relationships is the lack of physical intimacy. Luckily, modern technology has enabled us to have video calls in real-time. Sure, seeing someone’s face on the screen can’t compare to being able to hug them in person, but it is as good as it gets for couples who live far away from each other. Video calls will also allow you to share special moments with each other. For example, once you go shopping for the things you need for your apartment, you could include your significant other in the decision-making process by showing them around the store. You could also take them on a video tour of your new city and introduce them to your new friends.

Set Ground Rules

With the change of the physical distance between you two, the dynamics of the relationship are bound to change as well. In other words, you should agree on a set of rules to avoid miscommunication or arguments in the future. For example, if you are planning to go out drinking with your friends over the weekend, let your partner know in advance and be available throughout the night. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you should be glued to your phone, but simply make sure that your battery is charged and you have enough data to contact them if necessary. Likewise, if this is something you would appreciate they did for you, let them know. Trust is an important factor for any couple, but maintaining the same level of it once you’re far away can be difficult for some people.

Understand Each Other’s Feelings

If you have never been in this situation before, you will likely start feeling things you’ve never felt before, too. If your partner is acting overly protective or is being a little overbearing, try to understand where it’s all coming from. They are most likely not trying to be annoying – they are simply worried about you and your future together. Before snapping and starting an argument, always try to address these feelings rationally and with a lot of understanding. You’d be surprised by how much can be changed with a few words of compassion.

couple hugging at new apartment full of cardboard boxes, moving home
Acknowledge and understand each other’s feelings

Control Your Emotions

Much like you will be asking from your partner to mellow out their feelings of jealousy or insecurity, you should do your best to do the same for them. Remind yourself as often as you can that this person has been by your side up until the day you moved. Physical distance shouldn’t change that if the feelings between you two are genuine. So hush down the voice in the back of your mind trying to plant the seed of doubt and focus on the good things. Tell your partner how you feel and address the issue together.

Plan City Breaks Together

Just because you live in different states now, that doesn’t mean you can’t see each other. Whenever you get the chance, try to plan a weekend together. Perhaps your significant other could come to visit you for a long weekend, or maybe you could take a few days off to go back home and pay them a visit. If neither is possible, consider meeting in the middle. In fact, you could plan a whole trip. Choose a city that’s located along the way between you two that you haven’t visited and make arrangements to meet there. You will not only get the opportunity to catch up and spend some time together, but you will also be able to walk around, explore, and create new memories.

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