You are not the first or the last person thinking about moving for love when in a long-distance relationship. Perhaps you’re wondering if long-distance relationships even work, and don’t want to risk losing your significant other because of the number of miles between you. This is a crucial life decision to make, and you will have to take some time to consider all of the pros and cons of such a move. It will affect your and your partner’s lifestyles, as well as your family and friends back home.
Moving for Love When You’re in a Long-Distance Relationship Can Be Disastrous for New Couples
In case you are a new couple still getting to know each other, relocating for love might not be the best idea. Especially if you have only been together for a short period of time, and have only started your long-distance relationship.
There are many hurdles for a couple to overcome, and a step like living together is usually much further down the line. Perhaps you should first wait for several months, and see how you develop as a couple. Maybe it turns out that the person you’ve been dating isn’t the right one for you. On the other hand, they could be the one, but you won’t know that after only a couple of months of dating.
Have You Moved Before, and Are You Ready for Such a Significant Change?
Do you have any experience with long-distance relocations? Perhaps you’ve moved for college before, and you’re accustomed to living without privacy. Maybe you had a job that required you to relocate to another city? If you had, then you know how complicated relocation can be, and a move to a new state or country even more so. Are you ready for such a change at this point in your life, and are you prepared to face the consequences?
Living together with another person takes a lot of time to get used to, and things like privacy will be an entirely different matter. You will have to be open to the change of lifestyle, and it’s not only you who will be going through this.
Discuss It Thoroughly with Your Partner
Keep in mind that your partner will be going through the same experience, and asking themselves the same questions. Being open and ready to discuss everything with each other is a good sign that you’re ready to make a great leap and share a life. That’s precisely what you should do before you make such an important move, like the decision to move in a long-distance relationship.
There are many different things that you should consider, from financial to emotional matters. Even down to the most mundane, everyday tasks, be ready to embrace the change, give up some of your privacy, and talk about how both of you imagine your future together. If you feel free to discuss all of these personal matters, and don’t have any secrets, then relocating long-distance for love may not be a bad idea after all.
Is It Better for You or Your Partner to Move?
“Who should move?” is one of the critical questions that will pop into your mind from the get-go. Unfortunately, there is no simple answer to this question, and it actually raises even more questions for you to think about. Consider the following when you’re talking about who should be the one to move.
How Dependent on Your Family and Friends Are You?
Do you have a very close-knit group of friends that you just can’t leave behind? Perhaps you’re more emotionally attached to your best friends, and won’t be able to handle life without them? On the other hand, your partner could be the one with a network of friends they can’t live without. This is one of those honest and straightforward discussions you should have together. The same applies when it comes to your family. In some cases, people have older parents or siblings that require them to be around for a number of reasons.
Who Will Find Moving to a New City Easier?
Which one of you will have an easier time when it comes to adjusting to a new city in a different state? In case you’re thinking about relocating to another country, this can be a completely different beast to tackle. It means having to adapt to a different culture, and in some cases learning a different language. Do keep in mind that it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. There are benefits of moving too – perhaps one of you has been planning on relocating there for a long time, and you’re eager to learn and enjoy different experiences.
Whose Career and Education Will Depend on the Location?
You are planning on relocating for love, and though it may seem like one of the better reasons to move, make sure that you keep your long-term plans in mind as well. If you are done with your education, maybe you’ve been planning on studying abroad or in a different state?
How important is your career, and will you be able to advance it in your future city or state? Is finding a job going to be a problem, and if so, what are you going to do in case things don’t turn out as you had planned. These are the questions both of you should consider. Maybe it will be easier for one of you to move, and keep the same job or even find better ones in the new place.
Consider Both the Culture and the Climate
Relocating to a different state or country comes with a lot of challenges. Some will require you to adjust to a completely different set of rules and customs. On the other hand, the problem may be nature itself. Depending on how much you prefer a certain climate, it could be a deal-breaker or deal-maker. Maybe you just hate snow and the cold weather, and changing homes in winter is the last thing you’d like to do. On the other hand, it could be a matter of physical or mental health issues. For example, an allergy could be an essential factor in your decision-making process.
Discuss the Financial Matters
You will have to talk about the financial side of things sooner or later. It’s better to do it straight away and talk about every aspect of the move. From the seemingly smaller issues like who’s going to pay for the packing and moving services to the more important matters like who’s going to pay for the bills, will you share the costs even if one of you is in a better financial situation? It can be a hard discussion to have, but you’ll have to make sure that it happens.